wienermeister:

bridgemcgidge:

tommo-pan:

If you have been on Tumblr on the past couple of days, it’s likely that you’ve seen this post. I happened to stumble upon it randomly on my dashboard and usually, I scroll past really long texts but this one caught me by surprise because I recognized every single person in this photo. This was posted by someone I know very well who currently goes by the name Lexus Willow, but I know her as ‘Lex’. Lex and I were really close about four (maybe five? idk) years ago. We were best friends so obviously, I know each and every one of the people in that photo by name.

While true, her home life wasn’t ever ideal (her mom made us stop listening to ‘I Kiss A Girl’ at her 16th birthday party because they didn’t support that in their house) but honestly, her life isn’t as bad as she’s making it out to be. While her parents weren’t supportive of her being gay, the reason they are so harsh on her is because of her own dumb life choices. She has done tons of incredibly shitty things to her family that left be absolutely dumbstruck. She goes off with girl after girl, saying they’re the one, write them pretty songs but use them and uses her family as a springboard when she has nowhere else to go.

She admitted to cheating on her ex-fiancee with dozens of girls, but plays if off to everyone as she was the victim and everything was this girls fault. She uses the people around her, including her family. In fact, this one girl was at her graduation party, interacting with her mother and they knew who she was.

Lex’s life is far from perfect. She’s had a pretty rough past with being adopted and sure, her parents aren’t always 100% supportive of her lifestyle choices, but this isn’t a strict matter of her being queer. It’s her as a person. I normally wouldn’t really care that she’s getting attention for this but the fact that people are sending her MONEY to meet up with a girl she’s never met before (she does this a lot, btw) and say they want to write to Ellen is absolutely preposterous. Until Lex gets her life straightened out, this is not what she needs. She needs her family and you are all enabling her to continue on with her bad habits.

If you see posts about her, especially about donating money or writing to Ellen, PLEASE RESIST. There are so many more people who deserve this more than her and her family are NOT bad people. They aren’t evil. They truly want what’s best for their daughter, biological or not, and this is going to rip their family apart. I hope I don’t come across as a bitter person, but it honestly disgusts me that people are feeding into this when it’s not true.

If Lex sees this, I’m really sorry. I care about you deeply but this is going too far and you KNOW IT. You are stealing people’s money for your selfish needs and lying to them and it has to end. There are people out there who really are in horrible situations with no support whatsoever and they aren’t being heard but for some reason, people are eating this up, even though you’re the one who ripped your face off of that picture and have admitted to that. Please, please stop. I’m sure you could easily figure out who this is, maybe not, but I really think people deserve to know this. Your family loves you and this will tear them apart. 

Just be careful with this money business everyone.

Always be wary of giving money to people on the internet

Agreed.  In fact, you should all send me your money so I can hold on to it lest any of you accidentally give it to someone who has no business with it.

… ALL of it.

“Pancho, I swear to god I will end you.”

ethicalbreakdance:

eternalsloth:

dirty sloths

Earth elemental sloth.

The sloth rose his head from his earth bed and spoke in a voice as old as time.  ”Before I let you walk through the Glade of Shadows, you first must answer the Riddle of the Stone’s Song.”

dresdencodak:

What do you use to make your comics?

1. Cintiq 24HD table/monitor - the greatest invention devised by humans.
2. Adobe Photoshop CS4 - I don’t need to upgrade it for what I do.
3. Razer Nostromo Keypad - Ergonomic replacement for a regular keyboard. The programmable keys and small size make it indispensable for me.

And that’s it!

-looks at Aaron’s stuff-

-looks back that the 8.5”x11” paper, blue pencil, 1.0mm marker, and D&D DM’s handbook he’s been using as a desk to draw on for 12 years-

-flips table-

…. -pulls another muscle-

itswalky:

choochoobear:

hijinksensue:

Guess what, Internet? I have been hired by my good friends at Explosm to write for The Cyanide & Happiness show! 

I’ve been collaborating with Rob and Dave and Kris, et al on various comics, character ideas, animation concepts and songs over the last year or so, but now that their UNFATHOMABLY SUCCESSFUL Kickstarter is over and they’ve moved into full on production mode we’ve decided to make it official and I couldn’t be more excited.

The short version of the story is Explosm had been shopping the Cyanide & Happiness Show around to nearly every major network and cable outlet and after turning down offer after offer that required them to relinquish creative control of their show, they decided to forego the TV route entirely and produce the show on their own for the Internet.

The show will consist of  a series of animated shorts strung together into 12 minute episodes. The writing has been going FANTASTICALLY. It’s really some of the funniest stuff I’ve ever been a part of and the early animations are just outstanding. This show is going to DESTROY the Internet (as it was foretold in scripture) with laugh-make-times. I can not wait for you to see, and hear what we’ve got in store for you. Oh, what’s that? Yes, HEAR, because I will also be a voice actor on the show. I’m just checking boxes off my “Magical Wish Unicorn Dream List” left and right.

So, there you go. Big news. I’m super happy about it.

This show gets better and better and it’s not even out yet.

man i hope this means joel can introduce me to the explosm guys 

Me, too. I need to touch them for…. reasons that are my own.

hijinksensue:

Guess what, Internet? I have been hired by my good friends at Explosm to write for The Cyanide & Happiness show! 

I’ve been collaborating with Rob and Dave and Kris, et al on various comics, character ideas, animation concepts and songs over the last year or so, but now that their UNFATHOMABLY SUCCESSFUL Kickstarter is over and they’ve moved into full on production mode we’ve decided to make it official and I couldn’t be more excited.

The short version of the story is Explosm had been shopping the Cyanide & Happiness Show around to nearly every major network and cable outlet and after turning down offer after offer that required them to relinquish creative control of their show, they decided to forego the TV route entirely and produce the show on their own for the Internet.

The show will consist of  a series of animated shorts strung together into 12 minute episodes. The writing has been going FANTASTICALLY. It’s really some of the funniest stuff I’ve ever been a part of and the early animations are just outstanding. This show is going to DESTROY the Internet (as it was foretold in scripture) with laugh-make-times. I can not wait for you to see, and hear what we’ve got in store for you. Oh, what’s that? Yes, HEAR, because I will also be a voice actor on the show. I’m just checking boxes off my “Magical Wish Unicorn Dream List” left and right.

So, there you go. Big news. I’m super happy about it.

This show gets better and better and it’s not even out yet.

decemberpaladin:

iamcode:

netforce0:

descartes-and-thosecartes:

sensorydeprivationprincess:

turboslime:

Say hello to mechanically separated chicken. It’s what all fast-food chicken is made from—things like chicken nuggets and patties. Also, the processed frozen chicken in the stores is made from it.

Basically, the entire chicken is smashed and pressed through a sieve—bones, eyes, guts, and all. it comes out looking like this.

There’s more: because it’s crawling with bacteria, it will be washed with ammonia, soaked in it, actually. Then, because it tastes gross, it will be reflavored artificially. Then, because it is weirdly pink, it will be dyed with artificial color.

But, hey, at least it tastes good, right?

High five, America!

oh my god

bitch that’s the tubby custard machine

im crying

Perfect ending.

tragically beautiful

I am not used to being around a lot of people and it freaks me out.

This “responsible adult” crap sucks.